Oh My God, I Never Know How You Did It.

Working at Alltel, I find that most customers I meet, I want to choke the life out of for reasons too numerous to list. But I see this as an amazing opportunity to work on this "enemy" love that Jesus demonstrated. So I've began praying that instead of desiring to shove their cell phone down their throat, that I could Love them, and have compassion.

Boy has God really amped up the type of people hes sending me. Here is a sample conversation of what I deal with.

______________________________________________

(Girl Enters Store)

Me: Hi, how can I help you?

Girl: I want to put money on my (prepaid) phone.

Me: Ok, what is your phone number?

Girl (Sarcastically): You can't just put money on my account?

Me (Overly Cheerful in attempts to be patronizing): Well yes, I can, but I don't know what your account is by you just telling me you want to put money on it, I need your phone number.

Girl: 785-xxx-xxxx

Me: Ok, how much would you like to put on?

Girl: Whats my balance?

Me: Negative four cents.

Girl: Ok, I'll put four cents on it.

Me (In Disbelief): Four cents?

Girl (Sarcastically): YES.

Me (Still In Disbelief): First of all, you can only add whole dollar amounts, secondly, adding four cents would do nothing for allowing you to make phone calls.

Girl (Getting upset): Fine, put $1.04 on it.

Me: I just told you, I can only put whole dollar amounts on it.

Girl (Even More upset): Ok fine, put $5 on it.

Me (Confused): You want $5 on it now?

Girl (Upset again): YES.

Me: Ok, your total is $5.35

Girl (About to lose it): YOU SAID YOU CAN ONLY ADD WHOLE DOLLAR AMOUNTS!

Me (in shock): I did only add a whole dollar amount, but like everything you purchase, it has tax on it. If you didn't want to spend over $5, then I'll have to put $4 on it.

Girl: Noooo, I want to put $5 on it!

Me (saying "Ok" in the same way she said "No"): Ooooookkkk, then your total is $5.35 just like WHENEVER you purchase something for $5, it will come out to be $5.35 with tax. If you only have $5, then I can add $4 and the total will come out to $4.28.

Girl (More upset than ever and extremely sarcastic): BUT THATS WHY I ASKED YOU MY BALANCE, THATS WHY I ONLY WANTED TO PAY 4 CENTS!

Me (Totally confused): That makes no sense. What does you wanting to pay 4 cents have to do with the fact that we have sales tax just like everywhere you buy something?

Girl (Frustrated): I Don't WANT to add four cents, I want to add $5!

Me (Glancing to my co-worker for help): And I added $5, but with tax it is $5.35. If you want to Pay $5 EXACTLY, then you're out of luck because we can only add in whole dollar amounts and when you tax a whole dollar amount, it comes out to a non-whole dollar amount.

Girl (Acting like I blew her mind): Huh?

Me (Trying to conclude this): So do you want to put $5 on it or $4?

Girl: Just put $1 on it.

Me (Not even bothering to question this): Ok, your total is $1.07

Girl then sets a 5 dollar bill and a 1 dollar bill on the counter, in which I immediately and dramatically pick up the 1 dollar bill and give it back to her along with $3.93 from the register. Despite watching me hand back the same $1 bill that she had just laid down, the girl seemed completely unaware of why the $1 bill she gave me was unneeded.

____________________________________

To be honest, our prepaid system can be a little confusing. However, checking the transaction history, this girl has come in to our store to add money about 20 times, most of those times adding $5. So why the 21st time was such a struggle for her, I do not know. What I do know, is despite her ignorance and anger, that is not a reason to be sarcastic or to try to make her feel stupid. That is not love. I'm not saying that sarcasm in and of itself is wrong or unloving, but it is when it is used to try to make someone feel stupid, like I did. I confess that. I want the kind of love that imparts value and doesn't require it. For what good is it if I just love those easy to love? No, I want to love those that don't deserve it, because that is Godly Love, that is true love.

Down with some things, up with others. How about just up.

Well, it happened like I thought it might.

Whenever I write or say something like I did below, I usually regret it the next day.

NOT because I think I'm wrong or because I'm self-conscious, but because I feel the rants are rooted in anger.

Despite how it might seem, the below post is NOT aimed at people that vote, nor do I look down on anyone who votes. Its aimed at the institution and means being voted for . . .

Either way, I usually regret expressing my anger. I would so much rather be "pro" things and not all about "anti" things. Let the things I'm "anti" about worry about themselves, and I should focus on the things I'm "pro". Like, in this case, Gods Kingdom. This is rooted in a deeper pursuit in my life of striving to be a more optimistic person rather than an pessimistic person. So when I write posts like below, I feel that is giving in to the pessimism I am trying hard to fight.

I blame it on all the Rage Against The Machine I listened to in Highschool (and occasionly still do).

Here is a much happier end to the post . . .

People who check boxes and then eat potato chips and also something about eagles.

I try to avoid posts like this, but I feel a little fiesty and a little judgemental (Even though I'm truly trying not to be the latter).



The American Government is a Godless institution that has made itself God.

"Once Abolish The God And The Government Becomes The God"

- G.K. Chesterton

Its an Idol. One that promises provision, safety and security by faith in it when our faith should be in God.

The whole method of being elected as head of it and then being successful as head of it is reduced to verbal sleight-of-hands, straight up lies, deception, tell-em-what-they-want-to-hear, and who can come up with the best smear ads.

Government is the EXACT example of humans taking things into their own hands.

Our Government does NOT seek to Glorify God, in fact, our government has done everything to keep God out.

And they have. And it is Godless.

So when this Godless institution does things like wage wars to provide safety for us and justice for them, they do it in their own name and not in the name of the Lord.

So when you kill in your own name, you are a murderer.

Some vote for a candidate because of the tax cuts, economic plans, and social security issues that they will implement. Really? So if candidate X gets elected and your taxes go up, God won't be able to provide everything you need? Or perhaps just everything you want? Of course! You MUST vote! If your Taxes arent cut, or heaven forbid, raised, then your quality of life will go down! You'll have to actually trust God because you'll have less money to put your faith in! So Vote Vote Vote!!!!!

Some vote for a candidate because of his plan to legislate morality. And of Course EVERY time you make it illegal to do something, people immediately repent of it. Like those homosexuals and people who abort babies. Making it illegal always softens their hearts and never hardens them more. It truly solves the problem. Thats why I'm proposing that we illegalize anger, lust, heresy, alcoholism, pride, cussing, cheating, apathy and masturbating. This way, all those people who did these things before can now become Christians. Thats why Jesus came, to tell people to either quit it, or he'd just make it illegal. Ya know, to bind people to the law.

Some vote for a candidate because of the way he is going to help the poor and needy. Instead of helping people themselves, they elect a candidate who will do it best for them. Let the institution take care of it. This way, people have their needs met by an institution who doesn't give glory to God. Now they can focus on more important things like having their taxes cut so they can have more stuff and stopping two guys from having sex. (I will say, it is better an institution does good than no good done at all, its the institution behind it that I question . . .)

Some vote because everyone says that they should. Or because everyone does.

So I wonder, when Jesus says in John 18 that his, "Kingdom is not of this world" meaning that our kingdom is not of this world either, that we try to exercise our convictions by supporting something that is anti-kingdom. While it may have glimpses of our kingdom, or try to potray itself as our kingdom, it is very much not our kingdom. So why would we be involved in something that is anti-God in its actions, systems, and beliefs instead to seeking to bring the true kingdom to earth?

Jesus didn't try to accomplish things through the politics of his day, so why do we? Jesus wasn't anti-politics, and neither am I, he just focused on the TRUE kingdom and not a fractured, sinful, fallen attempt of humans taking things into their own hands.

So why so much energy into something that is not Gods Kingdom?

I'm not perfect. Even when addressing the roots of the issues I have against the government I fall horribly short and end up hypocritical. I apologize for the sarcasm . . . it is sometimes the best expression.

Above all, I do believe that pursuing politics is a step in the wrong direction. Both Democrat and Republican, while they may steal our lingo, say nothing and do nothing about our true Kingdom.


See my friend Gregg for more.

This below is up to you to decide if this helps or hurts my point . . .

Not theological, I'm doing better

Drowning in questions

God, I have so many questions.
Like, why did you drown all of those people?
And if you drowned them, why don’t you rupture
Tuttle Dam and drown me also?
Surely I’m more evil than them and condemn
this whole town? Or perhaps your anger was
quenched the first time?
Did Noah really sin less than them?
Why would you save animals over people? Or
could it be that people had become animals?

If so, I am an animal that can’t swim.
And I am drowning.
And I should.
I am evil.
And I should have been born in the time of the flood.
Before Jesus.
Before mercy?
Before Grace?
Before your anger was quenched?
God, I have so many questions.

Like why are some sent a flood
and others a Savior?

Hippies may recycle, but they smell like trash

This summer in Niagara Falls, working for Youthworks, Recycling and I forever had our relationship damaged. Its something about spending 40 minutes each night cleaning out black beans from the creases of tin cans just so to recycle a few of them, when to do so comes at the cost of much needed sleep that will finally push you over the edge. All the questions I have ever had about recycling finally came bursting out in my mind. Why do WE (If not us directly, then the government using our taxes) have to pay more to recycle then to trash something if recycling is so good and saves resources? Doesn't recycling use a lot of energy? What about when I DON'T clean out the beans in the can, who does that? How does the whole process work anyway?

Well apparently a lot of people have these questions, and it appears that recycling may not be so good after all. I would go into all the reasons why, but I don't think I can put it near as well as Pen and Teller can while using some choice words (ok, several) to emphasize the point. So I encourage you to watch and see for yourself!



If you made it this far and are still not convinced, here are a few more links.

New York Times
Here
Here
And Here

Of course, to be fair, I do have a googling bias. Apparently googling "Recycling is bad" doesn't send pro-recycling links to the top of the search results. Clearly, like pretty much everything, you can google sites that will attempt to totally debunk anything written in these articles. However, no site will debunk Pen and Teller, because they are quite obviously infallible.

My point is that, how many of YOU have actually LOOKED into recycling? Did you just assume it was good because people, such as your favorite celebrity, told you it was? Did you even think that their might be another side?

Whether or not it is truly more beneficial to recycle or not, I do not know. What I do know is that is more beneficial to reuse. So do that. Heres a site I just joined called freecycle that I love.

This post is dedicated to all the "The-world-is-going-to-end-if-you-throw-away-that-piece-of-paper" recylers who make me want to buy paper just to throw it away instead of recycling it.

Trick me once, shame on you, trick me twice and the book comes unbound.

So since my last blogpost, I was quickly informed by my roomate Luke that in order for my blog to reach the millions of people in which I've planned for it to do, I need to post more often then I've already started out doing.

So first, let me tell you my hindrances in doing so and how I plan to solve this problem.

My first hindrance is that my roommate stephen started a blog the same time I did. Not only has he already posted more than I have, hes a graphic designer. This means that in a fight to have the most creative blog layout, he will almost always win. I openly welcome any comments stating the superiority of my blog.

The second hindrance is the dissapointment I have felt in the ratio of comments to followers. Thus far, I have 4 comments on my first post, and only 1 follower. That one follower is my roommate Luke, which I had to ask to be my follower. So this leaves me to wonder why 3 people are quick to comment and slow to follow? I am very dissapointed in the fact that people aren't taking advantage of this feature. I have now used the word "dissapoint" in two different forms, and am positive that I misspelled it both times. Yep, spell check just confirmed it.

Those are really the only two hindrances that have kept me from throwing all my energy into this blog.

Now what I plan to do about it:

First off, I've started by putting links to a bunch of my friends blogs on my blog before I have even told them I have a blog. Luke told me that to get people to read my blog, I should post comments on their blogs. I like this idea, but first, I want to link them in my blog, so then when I comment on their blogs and they come on over to check out my blog, they see their name alreadly linked. This gives the appearance that I'm not merely commenting on their blog to draw attention to my blog, but I feel it says "Hey, I've been reading your blog before you knew mine even existed." So what this means is that everyone I've linked should shortly expect a comment on their blog so that you can experience this sleight-of-hand (so to speak).

The second thing I plan to do is randomly title every post I write. In seeing other people use this method, I feel this does an excellent job of drawing the reader in. Heaven forbid that I should ever write a post that has anything to do with my blog post. Cryptic writing is the key to getting people to discuss my blog.

The Third thing I plan to do, is to talk down to those who don't have a blog. Insults, sarcasm and emotional violence will be a part of this approach. The hope is to get people who don't have a blog to start a blog. Then this way, you better believe that I'm the first person they link/follow. Then everyone they link/follow after that will see my name on their page. This, of course, will get me many more friends. Mission accomplished.

Fourth thing, I plan on tattooing the URL of my blog to my forehead. However, I plan to leave out the "www." because that is a given in any URL. I feel this will draw much attention to me as a person, as well as my blog.

So there you have it. Blog post number 2.